nor·mal
/ˈnɔrməl/ [nawr-muhl] –adjective
1. conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.
3. Psychology.
b. free from any mental disorder; sane.
4. Biology, Medicine/Medical.
a. free from any infection or other form of disease or malformation, or from experimental therapy or manipulation.
In a previous post, I felt compelled to put the proverbial quotes around the word normal when referring to our lives after Josh's first chemotherapy treatment. Per the definition of the adjective, I wonder what percent of the world would consider themselves or their day to be normal. You?
Tackling each relevant definition from the bottom to the top...
Am I free from any form of disease? As far as I know. But we don't really know what's going on inside our bodies until a symptom appears. And we hope the symptom is obvious enough that we don't dismiss it as something else. In Josh's case, despite feeling healthy up until late last year (at which point only a few symptoms that didn't add up to anything suspicious), a cancer was growing. Maybe someday full body scans will become routine at annual physicals.
Am I sane? Another trip to the dictionary compels me to say "yes." I think my mind is in a fine, healthy state (my inexplicable draw toward horror fiction and non-fiction isn't something new and doesn't categorize as unhealthy, I don't think). Josh may argue that I don't use sound judgment at times, but I'd consider myself to generally have good sense.
Are my days feeling usual and natural? I go to work, I coach the soccer team, I cook dinner, I sit around the table (or in front of the TV during basketball and football seasons or the Friday movie night evenings) with my family to chat and laugh, I clean the house, I eat, I sleep. But underlying it all is the knowledge that Josh has a disease that he's fighting for his life against. That's not usual and not normal. And somehow all my daily activities with the added shadow of cancer become the new normal. How quickly we adjust.
Are you embracing your normal?
Normal - a distribution where 95% of the samples are within 2 standard deviations of the mean.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who's usually outside that 95%, it's overrated.