Can I crash on your couch?

I remember having a conversation with Anna several years ago about different kinds of friends. A point in that discussion that stuck with me was about how certain people tend to be, for lack of a better word, connectors. By that I mean that they work (or possibly it just comes naturally and so don't really work) at staying connected with the friends that they make throughout life. Friends for these people don't just drop off the radar as life circumstances take us this way and that. They somehow manage to not only stay in contact, but maintain some resemblance of a friendship even if time and distance are working against them. I have a friend out in California that I would call a connector. Because of many moves, he has lived several states and consequently left behind a trail of friends. It would be interesting to sit down with him at some point and find out which states he could not find a couch to crash on. I know his list would be a lot smaller than mine.

I seem to lack that elusive quality. A prime example of this presents itself front and center with the whole situation with my noma. Having news like this can cause you to rethink several aspects of your life. One of those for me was a strong urge to reach out to friends that I haven't had contact with for a long time. Thanks to the miracle of Facebook, email, and the internet, I was able to track down some old buddies from the past. But because of my inability to maintain those friendships to some degree over the past decade or so, my feeble attempt to reestablish those bonds goes a little like this pathetic exchange via email...

Me: "Hey Billy Bob Joe! Is this a working email for you?"
Billy Bob Joe: "Hey Josh! Yes, this email works. How are things going?"
Me: "Not so good. Turns out I have cancer. How are you doing?"

Why does it take getting cancer for me to dust off those friendship bonds? My best friend from high school will periodically call me on his way home from work. Connector. Have I ever called him just to chat? Not that I recall. Why not? Was my life before cancer so filled to the brim that I couldn't fit anything else in? My dad has tried to impart on us kids the importance of relationships- both family and friends. It is a lesson that I am still working on.